Generally, I have a tendency to not go to hospital because hospital is not for fun nor to enjoy but for necessity due to desperation.
I always wish I could avoid hospitalisation but after 5 years of being at home I had to be admitted to hospital just 4 days ago.
Anticipating bad outcome or bad diagnosis may have made me wait until the last moment but once I was in hospital, I found peace knowing that I was also in Allah’s care.
As a believer I depend on medications, but I depend on Allah for cure. If Allah does not accept cure, then nothing can cure me but if Allah can grant cure, nothing can prevent it.
The lifestyle in the hospital is different than home. In hospital I have to hear mostly about the worse possible scenarios regarding my illness.
After many investigations it is still a mystery and I can imagine how many people would be demoralised, disheartened, and disappointed about their possible future, but I can offer a suggestion for anyone who is either in hospital or is going to be hospitalised is that do not take the worse possible prognosis into your heart.
These are possibilities and take them as possibilities. What I do I hear, and I say, “Inshallah khair”. (By the will of Allah there will be some goodness in it). That Tawakkul (trust) in Allah put my mind in rest, and I only pray to Allah for the best.
I find the uncertainty about the diagnosis is a great opportunity to offer my heart and soul to Allah and to put my case with him and asking him for the best result.
I don’t want to waste my time worrying while I am in hospital, but I think I should use it for more reflection, for more self-assessment, and for more Dua.
Being outside or at home I experienced for the worldly things I was so busy that I did not have enough time to make dua but being in the hospital bed I find lot of time to make Dua to remember Allah’s grace and to connect more with him.
Now I understand that why sickness for believers is a blessing because it makes the believer pray more to do more Zikr and to do plenty of Duas.
These A’mals (actions) not only bring rewards from Allah but also removes sins and takes a believer into the higher spiritual status.
Being sick is not necessarily an issue to be worried, to be sad, to be angry, or to be devastated, but it should be opposite, it should make us pleased with Allah’s decision, should give us courage to fight back against sickness, to make great efforts to come out of it and to be relying on Allah for the best result.
Alhamdulillah, I do not suffer from anger or sadness, or worry for my sickness and for my hospitalisation. I focus on enjoying the efforts, the positivity and my connection with my Lord, the almighty Allah who blesses my life, and who will take me back to him when my time is finished.
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