Anger, if acted out, is the most destructive emotion which leads only towards darkness and despair. Anger ruins lives and makes you a slave of Shaytaan (devil).
We all suffer from this destructive emotion, some of us more frequently than others. Anger is remembered pain – painful memories and painful feelings that have not been processed. Anger is displayed in various ways in your body when suppressed pain is triggered by a signal.
At times the reason for anger is known if it is quite obvious, for example, if someone disrespects you or dismisses you, you may begin to feel anger. Other times, the reason may not be obvious but rather subconsciously embedded and triggered out of you when a certain incident reminds you of emotions attached to a past incident that was suppressed and not allowed proper healing.
Always seek professional help from a counsellor or psychologist to understand the root cause of your anger. Once you have identified your unhealed pain and hurt, it is easier for you to process the anger. If the anger remains unprocessed, you will be experiencing angry outbursts and heightened emotional reactions.
Steps to process hurt and to release them from your body
- Remove blame – You are where you are today, Alhumdolillah, because Allah sent certain people in your life through whom you learnt valuable lessons of resilience and courage because of the pain and hurt they inflicted upon you. It is time to let these people go. They have no power over you. Only and only Allah has all power over you.
- Abandon ego – the hurt you harbour is yearning for justice. Anger arises when you feel that justice has been denied to you and that you are still hurting but people who were responsible for causing that hurt have moved on in their lives. That is your ego speaking. Abandon your ego and acknowledge that Allah will provide ultimate justice to one and all. Allah is the only judge who knows exactly what happened and why it happened.
- Remind yourself that hurt heals with prayer. Be steadfast in your worship and feel at ease in your heart, feel it heal. The more you pray for a clean heart and calm nature, the more you will be free from anger.
What to do when anger grips you?
If you feel anger welling up inside you:
- Stop everything you are doing
- Close your eyes and take three deep breaths in and exhale softly
- If you are walking, stand for a while at one spot and breathe. If you are standing, sit. If you are sitting, lie down.
- Breathe, breathe, breathe.
- Become aware that you are managing the emotion called anger and choosing to act with calmness. Acting out the anger is destructive. Being aware of anger and choosing not to act it out is empowering.
- Make wudu and express gratitude to Allah for helping you overcome the angry emotion that was trying to ruin your peace.
Affirmation: Ya As-Sabr, Ya As-Sabr, Ya As-Sabr
Comments